Chief Joseph often talks about joy as the
foundation of our lives. This week we’re responding to one of our
reader’s feedback on our April 2 article, "The Gift of
Joy." If you want to see that article again, here
it is.
John Cali
Here is our reader’s letter, followed by part of my
response to her:
"I re-read your articles on Joy. Of course, I have read
them before but as humans, we like things tough.
"I myself am currently going through a dark time. My
house is gone, job is gone and most of my self-esteem. At the
age of 52, I have to start all over again. I can see down the
road how this will eventually be a good thing. However now I am
enmeshed, slogging through the mud of my misery. I have been
advised to get on anti-depressants but isn't this just a lack of
joy?
"My mom and I were discussing why we are so thick about
joy. My goal is to feel joy no matter what the situation. I
think we are innately martyrs -- truly crazy.
"Thanks again for sharing.
"I added another goal -- how to be a sunbeam, a.k.a.
barber."
(The "barber" reference is to Frank
in this newsletter.)
With her permission, I’m giving you this lady’s contact
information. Her name is Tara Dee and you can email her at this
address.
Please feel free to contact her and perhaps share some of your
own experiences. I firmly believe we can be powerful catalysts for
helping each other heal when we share in a positive loving way.
My response:
"I know it's not much comfort for you to know this, but
many people I've talked to recently are going through the same
challenges. And, I'm sure, even more I haven't talked to. It's
the "dark night of the soul" for many right now.
"But I don't believe, as you put it, "as humans, we
like things tough." Or that we are martyrs. I do think,
however, we're conditioned by our society to believe the myth of
"no pain, no gain." After all, so the myth goes,
success is hard work, it doesn't just fall into our laps.
"And yet, in my view, the only criterion of our
success as humans is the amount of joy we feel -- the amount of
love and appreciation.
"I think you're wise to resist going on
anti-depressants. That, of course, is only my opinion, and many
would disagree with me. As you said, this is ‘just a lack of
joy.’ Certainly, anti-depressants can offer temporary relief
for some in terrible shape.
"But the problem with anti-depressants, and I've seen
this among my own family and friends, is people get dependent on
medication. The solution -- again, my opinion -- is to get ‘dependent’
on your own inner resources and guidance. To focus on your
passionate desire for more joy in your life. And not to simply
numb yourself with drugs, alcohol, sex, whatever. That only
disempowers you. Those things really do work to numb the pain.
But they are only temporary ‘fixes.’
"My
barber, Frank, is certainly a great role model
for us. But he's also had his human challenges. Yet he's always
risen above them, and moved back into his centered, powerful
place of joy. In creating more joy for others, which he does so
expertly, he creates more joy for himself.
"I know you can do the same. I know you will move beyond
your daunting challenges back into your powerful place of joy. I
know this because I can clearly see it in your words and in your
energy. You're a very wise and strong woman. You cannot fail.
This is only a temporary setback and just another step on your
journey to success."
Now here’s Chief Joseph. I expected Joseph’s comments to be
brief. But I should know better than to think I know what to expect
with Joseph. When I do that, I’m usually wrong. ;)
Chief Joseph
We agree with John that humans do not, by nature, "like
things tough" or enjoy being martyrs. But your society teaches
you life is tough and you must expect to sacrifice and suffer.
In our view -- and in your higher selves’ view -- that’s
utter nonsense. It’s a myth. We don’t know exactly where, in
your human history, you got so far "off track" that the
myth became the reality of your experience.
But, after all, anything you keep thinking and believing must
manifest in your lives. That’s simply the law of attraction in
action.
We applaud Tara Dee’s goal to feel joy in all her experiences,
whether they be "good" or "bad."
Of course, there are no truly bad experiences because all
experiences, all paths, lead you back home to yourselves, to God.
You measure your human success in so many ways that don’t
really matter in themselves -- fame, fortune, power, position,
influence, and so on. While we are not discounting the value of
those, we are saying they do not matter unless you feel joy in your
lives all, or most, of the time.
Joy is the only criterion of your success.
It’s especially important to seek joy when you are feeling
joyless. For example, when you are facing challenges similar to Tara
Dee’s. There are no challenges you cannot successfully
meet. None!
When you are feeling torn, sad, confused, defeated, the absolute
best thing you can do is to get back in touch with your higher
selves.
One of the most powerful ways to do that is meditation, in
whatever form feels best to you. If you don’t, or cannot, meditate
(for whatever reason) there’s a simple, equally powerful
technique.
Breathing.
You might say you breathe all the time. That’s true or you
wouldn’t still be in your bodies. But we’re talking about conscious
breathing.
Just take a few minutes, especially when you’re feeling
stressed, to consciously breathe. Inhale slowly, deliberately for a
few seconds. Then exhale slowly a few more seconds. Then do it again
and again.
As simple and easy as that sounds, we promise you it will quickly
bring you back to a state of peace and joy, no matter what is going
on in the world around you.
You are all powerful beings of light. You can create the
lives of your dreams. While life may appear difficult on the
outside, it does not have to be difficult on the inside.
You create your lives from the inside out. It’s not the other
way around, as many believe, where what’s going on in the outer
world determines your happiness. When that seems to be happening,
what’s really going on is this: you’re allowing outer
circumstances to rob you of your inner power. It is impossible
for that to happen when you are in a state of joy.
Joy, friends, is the key to all the success you desire in your
lives. It’s that simple. Seek joy first, and all else you seek
will follow. It must follow.
Chief Joseph talks about related subjects here:
The
Power of Joy
Creating
Your Own Joyful Reality, Part 1
Creating
Your Own Joyful Reality, Part 2
Creating
Your Own Joyful Reality, Part 3
Creating
Your Own Joyful Reality, Part 4
Allowing
Good Into Your Life
Joy
Is the Key to All You Wish For
Feeling
Good
Do you have a comment or want to talk about this article with other
readers? Go to our Chief
Joseph forum.