John Cali

A reader recently wrote us this letter:

“Have you published anything about suicide? A friend of mine is depressed, and he’s considering it. I think it’s foolish unless there is absolutely no hope, and that’s an extremely rare case at best.

“Are there occasions when suicide is the only solution?”

Here’s Spirit.

Spirit

We are delighted to offer you, for your consideration, our view of this often weighty subject.

Our reader asked if there are occasions when suicide is the only solution.

Our first response to her question would be this:

Life is not a problem waiting to be solved. Life is an experience waiting to be lived.

So we cannot say to you suicide is always “the only solution” to a difficult life. We are not saying suicide is wrong or immoral or evil. We are saying it is not normally the answer to a sad or depressing life.

First let’s talk a little about suicide and its definition. Suicide, as your society defines it, is the taking of your own physical life by your own hand.

If, however, you believe, as we do, you all create your own realities, that must also mean you create your own physical death.

You choose the time and manner of your death–whether by “accident,” by illness, or by your own hand.

So, in a real and literal sense, you all will ultimately commit suicide. It’s that simple.

If you view death, or suicide, in that light, there can be no right or wrong. Your death may be appropriate or inappropriate, depending on your personal circumstances. But whether you call it suicide or otherwise, it is neither right nor wrong.

Remember this:

Ultimately, your highest and best authority is your own inner guidance. Always. No exceptions.

So if one finds her/himself in an intolerable and excruciatingly painful life–the details are unimportant–is suicide the only solution?

Sometimes, yes–or so it might seem to that person.

Let us paint for you this idyllic scenario:

You are born into a loving family and are raised in comfortable circumstances. You mature into a caring, loving human being, successful in many ways–in your finances, your relationships, your work, your health, and so on.

You live a long, fulfilling life and feel only gratitude that you were so blessed. You reach the age of 90 years, in good physical health and a sound state of mind. You decide you’ve had enough for this lifetime.

So you lay your body down in bed one night, and you go to sleep. When you awaken you are embraced by all those you’ve known and loved through the eons. And your physical body remains behind in your bed.

We see no difference between the scenario we’ve just described to you, and a scenario in which a depressed person puts a gun to his head and pulls the trigger. In both cases, it was time to go.

So we are not talking about suicide as a solution. Suicide, as we’ve defined it here, is a natural, unavoidable experience. An experience every physical human will ultimately pass through.

Is suicide a solution?

No.

Is suicide right or wrong?

No.

Is suicide inevitable?

Yes.

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