Almost everything—all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure—these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important.
Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart. ~ Steve Jobs 1955–2011


Life, Death, and Beyond

I want to thank all of you who read and commented on our last post about Wayne’s passing. Also, thanks to those of you who contacted me privately. All your comments were thoughtful and kind, and I appreciate it.

Several folks wondered about the “cause” of Wayne’s death. (His Facebook page said the cause was a heart attack.)

But that’s a common question, isn’t it? When someone dies, the first thing we usually ask is, “How?”

This reminds me of a discussion about life and death a friend and I had long ago. He said “We all have to die of ‘something.'”

But do we, really?

It’s true, most people die of “something.” But I believe we can die of “nothing.” We can die simply because we consciously choose to leave. We’ve done all we intended to do in this lifetime.

Impossible? Perhaps. Perhaps not.

My spirit guides say every death is a suicide. The reason? Because, at some level of our awareness, we choose the time and manner of our death.

That choice can be a fully, deliberately conscious one. We do not need the “excuse” of an “accident, illness, etc.

There are stories—you’ve probably heard some of them—of indigenous people who, when their time came, simply sat down in their lodging or under a tree, closed their eyes, and were gone. There was no apparent “cause.”

The great Nez Perce Chief Joseph died sitting at his campfire on September 21, 1904.

Here are two other examples I’m familiar with.

First, in an interview long ago, Dr. Deepak Chopra talked about his father’s death. The elder Chopra, also a doctor, was 82 when he died. He was active till the night of his death. In fact, he had seen patients earlier that day.

Here’s part of that interview, with Deepak speaking:

In my father’s entire lifetime I never once saw him sick or emotionally upset. He was the most patient and kind person….

(The night of his death) he woke up my mother and said, “Wake up. Wake up. I’m leaving now.” He said that twice, closed his eyes, and was gone.

There was no discomfort, no shortness of breath; he died as elegantly as he had lived. And he went with joy.

We celebrated his death because we knew he went exactly the way he wanted to go….He lived like a saint and he died like one. In India we call death “The Big Meditation.”

Second, my own mother, Mary, died in a similar way. She was approaching 90 years, in pretty good health, and still leading an active and happy life. She always said she did not want to linger and die in a hospital.

She didn’t. On July 17, 1988, she lay down on her bed at home, closed her eyes, and left, quickly and painlessly.

She had a beautiful life and a beautiful death. Her funeral was a happy, joyful event—a typical Italian funeral. We celebrated her life and all the love she brought into so many people’s lives. She was and is one of my greatest inspirations.


What do you think? Is death to be feared? (My spirit guides say dying is the easiest thing we will ever do.) Can we die at the time and in the manner of our choosing?

Please share your thoughts with us below.


Copyright © 2015 by John Cali

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This is one of the most powerful videos I’ve seen in a while. Its title, Most People Die Before Age 25, ought to get your attention. It got mine. We may choose, one way or another, when and how we die. But have we really lived?


Related posts:

Is Life ALWAYS worth living?
Fear, Death, and Immortality
The Scent of Roses
Cold-Blooded Murder


What other subjects would you like us to talk about in these posts? Please email me.


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About John Cali

Writer and publisher John Cali, author of 10 books, talks to ghosts and dead people. He writes about these adventures at his blog and website, and in his upcoming book, Conversations with Spirit: Real Answers To Life’s Pesky Questions, Book 1.

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