Who Are You? by John Cali

Have you ever asked yourself that question? Probably not. Have you ever asked anyone else that question? Probably not.

In earlier articles Spirit and I have talked about labels — how we humans label and define ourselves and each other. We typically use very narrow labels and definitions, which almost never reflect who we truly are.

For example, people often ask one another, especially at social gatherings, “What do you do?” If they asked, instead, “Who are you?” the answer would often be the same.

Which brings up an interesting point — we often define who we are by whatever label we attach to what we “do.” Examples: lawyer, doctor, writer, teacher, etc. And that is usually how we see ourselves. Hence we have limited self-images. Self-images which have little or nothing to do with who we truly are, with our essence.

While I see nothing wrong with telling folks what we do for a living, we often base our self-worth on that and nothing else. That’s why when many people retire from whatever work they’ve done all their lives, they feel lost and lonely. Their purpose for living has died. And shortly after retirement many of them, not surprisingly, also die.

It doesn’t have to be that way. What can we do to change it?


How about you? What are your labels and definitions for yourself? Please share your thoughts with us below.

We welcome your comments and thoughtful opinions. Please keep them kind and compassionate. If needed, we’ll edit for clarity. Also, we’ll delete anything we consider inappropriate.

Something New
We’re starting a question-and-answer feature in this blog. We invite all of you to send us your questions. We’ll publish Spirit’s answers in occasional blog posts. Please follow these guidelines:

1. Keep your questions “on topic” — that is, on the subjects we cover in our blog and newsletter.

2. Your questions should be of interest to all our readers. If you have personal questions, those would be more appropriately covered in private readings.

3. Email me your questions. While I cannot guarantee we’ll be able to answer all questions, we’ll do as many as we can.

13 Responses

  1. John Cali

    Thank you again, Sarah, for your great kindness and support. We all appreciate it. And we appreciate YOU.

    Big hugs,

  2. Judith Anderson

    My main story of how I define myself is Spiritually: As a spark of God expressing. If I can remember this and that it is also true of everyone and everything else, I do well. This includes understanding that much of what happens in the third dimensional experience has more complex connections that I cannot completely fathom while within them and to simply trust.

    The next step is to define myself by the things that bring me Joy within the third dimension.

    I am a grandmother. I cannot imagine deeper unconditional love.

    I am a writer/photographer, specializing in Archaeological sites, which are often also sacred sites, and I have been fortunate to travel to many wonderful places in the world. So many wonderful people met from so many countries.

    I am a classical pianist and still play for my own pleasure in music.

    I am a collector of books and a compulsive reader and interested in so much and am delighted that there is still so much I do not know.

    I am a Liberal/Progressive, fascinated by politics and frequently am glued to C-SPAN and would like to be a US Senator. To me, politics is a microcosm in which we are constantly challenged to live by our spiritual knowings.

    I am a swimmer and love to be in water and can turn into a prune after several hours of “just one more lap.”

    I realize that the other things I could say to define myself, such as being a bereavement counselor, do not yet bring me joy, and perhaps I need to work on that.

  3. Ginny

    John, as we know there are no coincidences. I am in the draft stages of writing my first speech for Toastmasters International and the topic for us to write about is “ourselves.”

    My speech is to be, that the first thing people ask us is “What do you do?” My question following that is “Does what we do, define Who we are?” I don’t think so. I am an author, mother, wife, grandmother, group facilitator, etc. but that is not who I am.

    In short, I am a kind loving person who has so much love to give. I am redefining my life and the purpose has to be to help other’s and being able to make a living while doing it. I am not what I do. I am much more than that.

    Thanks for your thoughts on this subject.
    Ginny O’Connor

    • John Cali

      Thanks very much, Ginny, for your thoughtful and wise comments. I love your statement, “I am not what I do.” We would all lead happier, more joyful lives if we could believe and live that.


      • Doug Schwinn

        For many years I carried 2 Dog Tags,(Military I D) and “P-38” C-Ration can opener on my key bob. I was reminded, when it was my time, that these items were a constant reminder to be always vigilant,on duty and always a “Victim” of a “failed” War in Vietnam. I put those items in my medicine bag and did a personal ceremony to go “Off Duty.” I am now a “New Creation” free, In Spirit and Spirit in me. Free at last and at Peace with the world. When I grow enough, I think I may be a Teacher. What do you think?

        • John Cali

          Thank you, Doug. With that background, I think you’d make a great teacher.


  4. Mikala St. Germain

    In a group training with the Journey, one of the exercises is for two people to sit together and repeatedly ask, “Who Are You?” Each answer must be new. Deeper and deeper are the answers and you learn so much from yourself and about yourself. It is amazing that after 1/2 hour or more, many people answer with, “I am You.”
    Blessings to all.

    • John Cali

      Thanks very much, Mikala. I love this exercise, especially the answer “I am you.”


  5. Shirl

    I have said for a very long time that self-examination or self-discovery is the key to all that has purpose in our lives. For the most part the mass consciousness of this country and perhaps the entire planet does not encourage us to discover who we are.

    To seek to know ourselves is more important than any other task we might choose to focus on here. I have related it to Living Life On Purpose. So many feel that Life just “happens” to us and we don’t have any say or influence on how it unfolds. I feel from the depth of my very being that we choose and we have every ability to choose to Live our Lives on Purpose.

    During my many decades of quest for who the “I” is that I am I have come to know that I AM who I AM Becoming. It is my goal and my purpose to become the very best version of me that I am able.

    As we live in an evolving Universe, an evolving world, what version of me presents itself in this NOW moment will forever be evolving into a more refined version of the I AM THAT I AM BECOMING in the next NOW moment. We are evolving souls, evolving spirit, evolving energy beings and we will ever be so. There is no end to the journey. There is only greater and greater understanding, more expansion into that which we call All That Is. All that Is is eternally evolving, just as we are.

    Once you learn who you are at the deepest level of your being, you can see how and who you wish to become. And you can surly become ALL that you intend. . .and more.

    Blessings and Hugs

    • John Cali

      Thanks very much, Shirl, for you wise insights. You’ve reminded me of a question I ask myself every morning before I meditate: “What is the greatest ideal of myself I can be today?” (That’s not original with me — it came from Dr. Joe Dispenza.)

      Big hugs,

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