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A few days ago I was chatting with an old friend. We have a good relationship, but she’s very talkative, and not always a good listener. That sometimes creates tension between us.

This particular day I decided to just listen to her, and keep my words to a minimum. She’s been having some daunting challenges in her work and personal life. She talked a long time, and I mostly listened.

After she was done, and we were about to say goodbye, she paused and looked me directly in the eye. She said “Thank you for listening and being my psychotherapist today. You helped me a lot.”

After we’d said goodbye I mulled over the whole thing. How had I helped her? Her psychotherapist? All I did was listen.

And then it struck me. In this crazy, noisy world of ours, many folks feel unheard and unseen—like my friend.

If we listen not only with our ears, but with our hearts, we can help others heal their lives. How? By showing them they are heard—someone cares—they are seen.

We all want to be seen and heard. The more we help others feel seen and heard, the more others will see and hear us. And the more we will help each other heal our lives in whatever ways we need healing.

Here’s Spirit.


  • When you are connected to yourself and to Spirit, you attune your ears and your heart to listen—to yourself, to others, to animals, to trees, to the world. They all have messages you need to hear.

  • Actually, you are always connected to Spirit. You cannot not be connected, for you are Spirit. You just forget sometimes.

  • When you first encounter people—be it old friends, family, or strangers—make eye contact and send them divine love.

  • One powerful way to do that is to silently say the word, “Namaste.” This ancient Sanskrit greeting means “The Spirit in me acknowledges the Spirit in you.” The other people will feel that acknowledgment deep in their souls.

  • When you want to really listen to someone—or when you want someone to really listen to you, first silently say “Namaste” while looking her/him directly in the eye.

  • When it’s easy to be kind, be kind. When it’s hard to be kind, be kind.

  • The kindest thing you can ever do for another is listen to her/him not only with your ears, but with your heart. They will feel your love. You will help them heal, if that’s what they need.


Sound expert Julian Treasure says, in our loud world, “We are losing our listening.” In this video he shares five ways to re-tune our ears for conscious listening—to other people and the world around us.

Related links:
Connecting To Spirit
Kindness Prevails


Do you find it hard to listen—really listen—to others? Do you even really listen to yourself? What can you do to become a better listener? Please share your thoughts and comments with us below.

What other subjects would you like us to talk about in these posts? Please email me.


About John Cali
John Cali is a writer, blogger, and channel for a group of spirit guides. His next book is Real Answers to Life’s Pesky Questions: Conversations With Spirit, Book 1. John lives in northwestern Wyoming. Sign up for his newsletter here.