When You Love Yourself Your Problems Are Solved by John Cali

Image by Saragutierrez06

My spirit guides often talk about love, including self-love. They say animals are among our best teachers in learning to love, especially to love ourselves. All love starts with ourselves. In today’s world we seeing an epidemic of self-hatred—the source of virtually all this planet’s woes.

As Louise Hay says, “Self-approval and self-acceptance in the now are the keys to positive changes….When we really love ourselves, everything in our life works.”

I grew up with some pretty dysfunctional people, some in my family and others among my friends. I did not see them as dysfunctional then. But now, in hindsight, I do. None of them truly loved themselves—some didn’t even like themselves

While I wasn’t dysfunctional when I was growing up, I sure could have used a lot more self-approval and self-acceptance!

My mother’s and father’s generation were Sicilian immigrants. They met with barely disguised prejudice from many Americans when they first came to this country over 100 years ago.

So they too struggled with self-acceptance. Also, they were Roman Catholic, and raised us in the church. Back in those days, there wasn’t much encouragement from the Catholic hierarchy to love ourselves. In fact, just the opposite. We were sinners, and deserving only of punishment for practically all we thought and did.

Those of you who are or were Catholic may remember, at the communion part of the mass service, we had to say “Lord, I am not worthy….”

In fact, our Catholic parish was “segregated.” The parish priest enforced a “rule” requiring Italians to sit on the left side of the church, and “Americans” on the right side.

Talk about lack of self-love, self-approval, and self-acceptance! We had it big time!


Mama Hill is a woman you may have never heard of—I hadn’t till recently. She’s a retired Los Angeles school teacher who’s bringing love and healing to so many who grew up without either. In this touching video she talks about the healing power of love, particularly self-love.

Related links:
Love Is a Choice
Love Is Not Enough

Do love yourself unconditionally? Most of us don’t, or at least didn’t at one time or another in our lives. What can you do about it? Do you have any suggestions for others struggling to love themselves? Please share your thoughts and comments with us below.

What other subjects would you like us to talk about in these posts? Please email me.


About John Cali

John Cali is a writer, blogger, and channel for a group of spirit guides. His next book is Real Answers to Life’s Pesky Questions: Conversations With Spirit, Book 1. John lives in northwestern Wyoming. Sign up for his newsletter here.

12 Responses

  1. Mark Meyers

    I LOVE the video of Mama Hill… here is a perfect example of someone using Love as their superpower!
    I believe that love is the real life superpower of human beings! The time has come for us to claim our power.
    Love is a power that we were all born with. It is built right into us. It is always available in unlimited supply. it does not cost anything. All we have to do is wake up to this fact, activate this power, tap into its energy, give it away, embody it, nurture it, direct it, BE it.
    Nothing is more important. Nothing is more needed.
    Love is YOUR superpower!

    • John Cali

      Thanks very much, Mark. We sure could use a lot more Mama Hills!

      I agree — love is our superpower. As Louise Hay says, love is the key to healing our bodies and our lives.

  2. canron

    I was captivated by Mama Hill´s description of her early experiences with her father as it was an exact replica of the story Sandra, my wife, told me about her experiences with her father, a gynocologist.
    These stories are a wake up call for me and help me drop all my negative judgements and I need all the help I can muster, sometimes.
    Many thanks!

    • John Cali

      You’re most welcome. We all need help now and then. I think one of the best ways we can honor and love ourselves is by asking for help when we need it.

  3. Dr. John Muciaccia

    John, thank you for writing such a wonderful piece on love. Mama Hill was great to watch. One of those interviewed said, “Mama Hill comes at everything with love.” That seems to say it all, doesn’t it! Thank you. Love, John Muciaccia!

    • John Cali

      You’re most welcome, John! She is beautiful to watch! Yes, that does say it all — love is the answer, the only one.
      Love to you, dear brother,

  4. Mike L.

    I have been really working on changing my perspective of viewing things as “right” or “wrong” and just letting them BE. Everyone on this beautiful planet has their own unique journey and allowing people to just be without judgement has helped me love people more, including myself. When our planet can look at one another and feel only love, we will know peace like no other.

    • John Cali

      Thanks very much, Mike. I completely agree — when we can look at one another only with love, peace on earth will become a reality.

  5. Jeanne

    Loving yourself is the whole enchilada. There is nothing else. You can meditate for hours every day, endlessly chant affirmations, read channelings from your favorite entities and spend the rest of you time trying to figure out what they are saying and what you are doing wrong. You will probably see some “improvement” and make “progress”, but you cannot avoid the fact that you seem to go just so far and no further.

    What you are looking for cannot be understood. You cannot “figure it out”. You will remain locked in the same place until you love yourself and wholeheartedly approve of yourself. Once I set out to love myself, everything started falling in place. No improvements were needed. Habits that did not serve me just fell away. I never “tried” to do anything. I just accepted everything as it was and did not judge it or me.

    Really, people sweat and strive and work at it, and all they have to do is realize that they are already there and just accept it. You cannot do it wrong. You can stand in your own light and make things difficult for yourself, but that is not wrong. It just makes it difficult for you.

    You are a god, and a powerful one at that. You came here because you wanted to and because you had a job to do. You are doing just fine and there is no need to search for your “job”. You will do it automatically if you don’t block yourself by trying to insinuate your ego’s ideas of what you “should” be doing into your life. Relax. Enjoy. Smell the flowers and have fun.

    Love yourself. Have fun. It all seems just too simple, doesn’t it?

    • John Cali

      Thanks very much, Jeanne. You said it beautifully.

      My experience mirrors yours — once I learned to love myself, life began getting easier and more fun.

      As you said, it all seems to simple. It IS simple. And it’s easy.

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